Tag Archives: rants

I’ll never play the violin again…

After lunch I went to go back up to my floor at work. There was a huge crowd in the foyer waiting for the lifts. Every now and then the lifts stuff up and the call button doesn’t work. So the only way to get a lift is to wait for someone to come down to the ground floor.

Actually, this can be kind of confusing. I’m in no hurry to get back to work, but there is something incredibly annoying about standing there watch 4 out of the 5 lifts bounce between to 20th and 24th floor. The 5th one, of course, is out of order…

Fortunately when one lift comes the others follow it in a group. So 2 lifts arrived in foyer and get packed with my fellow semi-comatosed building dwellers, but I could see a third one was on it’s way…

Anyway, the lifts aren’t very patient and the doors close pretty quickly. It’s a common sight to see people to lunge forward as soon as a lift empties out so you can be sure the doors don’t close, cause often when they close they move on instantly and there is no way to stop them cause as I said, the call button doesn’t work.

So it was a little frustrating when the lift arrived and the door opened the current occupants decided to pause and consider their horoscopes before exiting. Then a woman who had positioned herself right in front of the lift, decided what ever she was texting (probably ‘OMG, you won’t believe what my horoscope is telling me today’… With a LOL thrown in for good measure) was worth finishing before she got into the lift. So I quick threw out my arm to keep the doors open, just in time to hit the tip of my finger on one of the doors that had decided everyone had enough of an opportunity to enter and it was time to be on it’s way.

The door managed to bend my finger back, bend the fingernail back further, split the finger nail (only a couple of millimeters) before grudgingly opening again. I spent the whole lift trip nursing my finger, staring daggers at the stupid phone woman and wondering if I could be fired for expressing my opinion, loudly, at what a complete moron she is.

Moral of the story. People are to dumb to be trusted with lifts, phones or horoscopes.

PS. I’ve been incredibly busy at the moment. So I’m not sure how frequent posting will be. But I’ve been sent another picture from my mother, so I’ll try to put that up soon.

PPS. But really guys, I mean I stop posting for a while, quite a while I’ll admit. So you tell me, why is it when I’m not posting I seem to get more visits to this site!!! Are you all trying to tell me something?


That’s Mr Corporate Goth to you…

So I had my presentation for that 2IC thing today.

Yes, after much advice I chickened out and didn’t bring up the immanent arrival of the Xzzffaghtians. So please for my sake, look surprised when they get here.

Anyhoo… I finished putting together the presentation at 11:30 Sunday night. Mainly because I found it so boring, I kept putting off… which I suspected I might regret. I was tired and thought getting all my clothes ready for the interview could wait until morning. Little did I know that’s when the real fun would start!

First, to explain, I’m not your traditional corporate type. I’m sort of “did you sleep in a gutter last night?” type. My whole look is mainly designed to make people to want to avoid talking to me. This is evident when it comes to suits. I hardly ever have to wear a suit. I don’t like suits. At least, I don’t like suits on me. I think I need to drop 20kg and earn 20k more before I’ll look good in one. For some reason this means I’ve ended up with nothing but a couple of cheap nasty suits that even I wouldn’t be seen dead in…

But I do have a few dress shirts for when the occasion calls for it. So when I woke up this morning I grabbed my favourite one and decided to give it a quick iron. I had been told after all, that appearance was going to be important.

I dragged the ironing board screaming out of it’s hibernation and get most of the way through ironing the shirt when I notice a big tear in the sleeve. I had no idea how it got there and I was annoyed because it was one of my favourite shirt, but I decided to move on.

Then I realised most of my other shirts weren’t washed. Now this is embarrassing to admit, cause I hadn’t worn them for a while. It’s just that they’re in what has been referred to of late as my ‘laundry pile’ (as opposed to ‘laundry basket’ whatever that is?) and haven’t actually made any of the collections that went as far as the washing machine.

But I did have one clean one. The one I bought for a funeral. Which is black. I only have black dress pants.

I was going as mr sketchy, the corporate goth.

Not what I had mind. But I ironed that shirt and moved onto the next challenge. Shoes. Again, I do have a pair of decent shoes… but since that were black as well, I was starting to feel like I was going to appear dressed as the ghost of future redundancies. I thought that might not send the right message.

I’ve got a pair of work boots that are comfortable but will pass most corporate glances, I decided to risk it. I was busy tying them up, when one of the  laces snapped.

Great, I have no spare shoelaces.

I went to the nice shoes and found a shoelace I could  steal and use in the shoes I was planning to wear. By this time I think I was meant to  get the train 5 minutes earlier.

So, take two at doing up my shoes.


Honestly I think I said “oh your fucking kidding me!” a little too loudly for such a peaceful and quiet winter morning. At least, peaceful and quiet outside my flat…

And truly, things only went downhill from there…

blogging is a great way to be insulted!

so, i’ve already had wordpress imply that i’m some sort of smut peddler

now, when i talk about visiting my family and family secrets, this is what wordpress links me with…

Oh, it's on!
Oh, it's on!

who needs trolls?!?!

p.s. i got so bored at work today, i figured that i would try to post this in my lunch break. apparently work has decided that would be too exciting and blocked my ability to upload images to wordpress.

either that, or wordpress has gotten tired of all this dancing around and is officially declaring war on me. my next post will be from the trenches!

it’s a perfect example of how my week is starting off.

like i’ve  decided to open a new account with a different bank, i got to the front door of the bank and realised i had no idea if i would need proof of my address. or id. or money.

so i thought i’d check their website and found i didn’t even need to go to the bank. you can start a new account online and i doubt they worry about you feeding your latest bills into the dvd tray of your laptop to prove where you  live. in fact the only thing you need if your tax file number. which i really couldn’t remember for the life of me. fantastic.

honestly, if i was ever in a science fiction movie and i needed to stop the self destruct sequence, i’d run to the override computer (through all obligatory hallways full of pipes venting steam) only to be spending the last five seconds going;

“now was it 344 or 334?”

then *ka-boom!*

moral of the story, don’t ever trust me with your spaceship… or something.

p.p.s. i have no idea that if your postscript become 3 times longer than the original message, you have some sort of moral obligation to swap them around. i plan not to lose any sleep over it!

p.p.p.s i have no idea what’s up with the text formatting. wordpress really, really hates me!

The answer…

OK, so I emailed the person I know and forwarded them yesterdays post.

I got the annoyingly sensible answer, that while they weren’t comfortable with me talking about this issue in a public forum, it was my blog to do with what I wanted.

So for now I have, because of circumstances, I decided on the following course of action.

I’m going to start drafting up a post that talks about all the things about this particular situation that has annoyed me, but talk about it in a more general sense.

And yes, I agree, I’m wussing out and falling into my old habit of self censoring (which I agree with Miss Maybel, is a pretty unappealing idea.) However, I feel in this particular situation, is the right path to take.

Keep tuned, it won’t be my next post but it will be soonish…

So it’s been a little quiet…

To tell the truth, I have been incredibly busy and will be so for the next week.

I did start to do a post today, it was another rant, but when I think about it, it gets complicated.

It is about someone I know. However, I can’t remember if I ever sent that person a link to this blog. Even if I have, I don’t really care but putting the post up could, and most likely would, make someone we both know very uncomfortable and that’s something I don’t really want to do.

I’m in two minds. Part of me is saying that I’m naturally censor myself too much. This blog was something I wanted to use to get over that. But I’m not sure if dropping a friend in it is a price I want to pay to get over such an issue.

I’m going to wait 24 hours and contact my friend. I’m sure their opinion will influence me, but I don’t know how much in this situation… after all, it’s not this is a widely read blog.

Urg, most of the people that read this are blog writers. Have any of you been through a similar situation and how did you handle it?

Or have I simply made no sense and no-one knows what I mean?

Gah! Times I wish unreasonable violence onto people I don’t know…

So freaking frustrating. I’ve arranged to buy a second hand mac laptop. It’s through a friend of a friend and a pretty good deal, plus it will let me test drive how I feel about using a mac at home. My friend, being an incredibly nice guy. Bought the laptop of the person he knew for me. Mainly cause he knew I wouldn’t be able to afford it all right now. However I hate owing large sums of money to friends so I thought I’d get the bulk of the debt out of the way as soon as possible.

One way I thought I could do this is by finally cashing in all the money from my change bowl. I’ve been lazy about doing this for a few years now and it’s collected into a fair amount. In fact, after I counted it out, I found I had around $700 in 10, 20 and 50 cent pieces. The main problem with that it is that it ways a freaking tonne.

I thought about how I was going to get it to the bank, since I don’t drive or have a car. I toyed briefly with the idea of public transport but ended that concept with “Bugger that for a lark.” And called for a cab.

Has anyone here rung 13 CABS of late? They have the most annoying hold music. It loops every 10 or 15 seconds and even when booking the cab by the time someone answers, you have to bite down the urge to scream “I HOPE YOU CHOKE ON YOUR HEADSEAT FOR MAKING ME LISTEN TO THAT CRAP!”

But bite down the urge I did and politely booked my cab, was told the next available cab would be sent out to me. So I grab my backpack full of small silver discs and gave myself a hernia carrying it out to the front of the drive way. Honestly it was one of those times when I took off the back pack I could feel my spine stretching back into it’s default shape. Then I started the waiting game, by, well, waiting.

I waited.

I waited.

And I waited.

After half an hour I thought, it’s odd that it’s taking this long to get a cab in the middle of the afternoon. At 45 minutes, I thought the cab company had won this round of the waiting game and I should ring them back. So I subjected myself to the annoying hold music again while I had to wait for over 10 minutes for someone to answer simply so I could ask where my cab was. Finally it rung through, I heard someone pick up.

And disconnect the line.

I work supporting a call center department. I know it happens. People make mistakes and press the wrong button. But as soon as I realized this meant I would have to subject myself to the hold music yet again I couldn’t stop myself from screaming at my phone “YOU STUPID FUCKING MORONS!” I probably should have had a little more self control since I was standing in the middle of the street outside my block of flats, but I will admit I felt a little better for it.

But then, I saw a 13 CABS taxi driving down the street and I was filled with relief and goodwill towards all again. I walked over, gave myself a double hernia picking up my backpack and turned around to see the cab turn the corner and drive off to parts unknown.

Grumbling, I put myself through annoying hold music again. Laughed bitterly when the soul destroying music was interrupted with messages like “Need to get to the airport? 13 CABS will get you there on time.” And finally the call was answered. More surprisingly, they didn’t hang up.

I explained my situation and asked where was my cab. I got told my area was experiencing bad delays. I thought about explaining while I couldn’t speak for the rest of the area, my delay was starting to get a bit beyond ‘bad’. I contented myself with asking how much longer did they think it was going to be. The answer was the informative “I really couldn’t say”.

I explained I was trying to get to my bank in camberwell before it shut, something I wasn’t really worried about when I originally called at 2:30, but now was starting to think was going to get tricky soon. So if she thought that wasn’t going to be possible, she should just say so and I’ll make other arrangements.

“Oh, I’ll mark your pick-up as a priority. If someone isn’t there in ten minutes call us again.”

I couldn’t resist. “Do you mean, I should hang up and call straight back so after the ten minutes on hold, I can tell you if the cab is actually here?”

There was a little forced laugh and was told, no, just wait ten minutes.

Well the 10 minutes went past and the cab wasn’t there, I really couldn’t be bothered ring again and after another quarter of an hour, it started to pour down. Swearing, I picked up the backpack again, careful not to give myself a triple hernia, but managing to fuse my spine into one solid mass, I walked back up to my flat and cancelled the cab altogether.

By email.

What a waste of an afternoon.